How to say “No.”

By Chasity Kuttrus

We’re almost into the last month of 2012. It’s the holidays. It’s the end of the year. We’re all rushing around, shopping, celebrating and trying to tie up loose ends from 2012 and planning for 2013. And the requests for time, money, help and more keep coming in. At some point, you’re going to have to say “No” to some things. And that’s hard.

But it doesn’t have to be. In fact, the more you say “No” the better at saying “No” you become. Here are 5 ways to get you started.

1. Recognize that there is nothing wrong with saying no.
Really, I promise. You own your time and your life. Very few circumstances leave you with no options. And, it’s better to say no than to say yes and disappoint.

2. Remember, the “Yeses” add up.
Lots of small requests add up and before you know it, you’re spending all of your time on relatively unimportant favors, requests and tasks for others.

3. Know what you want.
It’s a lot easier to say no to things you don’t want when you know what it is that you do want. If you want to work with a certain type of client but another type approaches you, if you know what you want, it’s much easier to say no thanks.

3. Be polite and confident.
It’s always a good idea to be kind and polite when saying “no.” And, decline with confidence. If you waffle, you may find yourself agreeing to a part of the request or, even worse, the entire request!

4. Be brief.
Overexplaining the reason you’re saying no undermines your own confidence. The person does not need to know details. Honestly, it’s none of their business. Provide a brief reason and then move on.

The first time you decline a request, it will be extremely empowering. The more you say “No,” the more in control of your time and talents you will feel. Try it! (But don’t say “no” to this request, though!)